A "life story" for a funeral or celebration of life is different from an obituary. An obituary announces a death. A life story tells a life.
It's the piece that will be read aloud at a memorial service, printed in a program, included in a memorial book, or shared with family members who couldn't attend. It's longer, more personal, and more literary than an obituary — and it's often the document the family will return to for years.
Done well, a life story doesn't just record facts. It captures the quality of a person — the specific way they moved through the world that was entirely and unmistakably theirs.
This guide covers everything that belongs in a life story, with memory prompts to help you gather the material that matters most.
Life Story vs. Obituary: What's the Difference?
| Obituary | Life Story |
|---|---|
| 200–400 words (newspaper) | 600–2,000+ words |
| Announces the death, lists survivors | Tells the story of a full life |
| Fact-focused with personal details | Narrative, anecdote-driven, character-first |
| Published in newspaper / funeral home site | Read at service, printed in program, kept as keepsake |
| Informational tone | Warm, literary, celebration-of-life tone |
Many families prepare both: a shorter obituary for publication, and a fuller life story for the service and a keepsake book. EverWord creates both from the same set of questions.
The Complete Checklist: What to Include
Use this as a gathering tool before you write. You don't need every item — aim for depth over completeness. One vivid detail in a category is worth more than five bland ones.
1. The Beginning: Who They Were Before You Knew Them
- Full name — including maiden name, middle name, and any childhood nickname
- Date and place of birth
- Parents' names and a brief note about the family they grew up in
- Where they grew up — hometown, neighborhood, the house they remember
- Siblings and their place in the family
- One memory or story from childhood that captures something essential about them
- What they were like as a child — a quality, a tendency, a thing they were known for
2. Education and Coming of Age
- Schools attended — especially high school and college if relevant
- What they studied or what they were drawn to
- A formative experience from this period — a teacher who changed them, a friendship that shaped them, a moment that set a direction
- What they wanted to be when they were young — even if life took them somewhere different
- Military service, if applicable — branch, years, where they served, honors received
3. Love, Marriage, and Family
- How they met their partner — the story, not just the year
- Marriage date and location
- Children's names (and partners), grandchildren, great-grandchildren
- What kind of parent or grandparent they were — a specific thing they always did, a value they instilled
- The family traditions they created or carried forward
- A family memory everyone will recognize
4. Work and Life's Purpose
- What they did for work — where they worked, for how long, what they were known for professionally
- What they loved about their work — or what drove them to do it
- A story about them at work that people who weren't there would remember
- If they didn't have a conventional career — caregiving, farming, community work — name and honor that work explicitly
- What they were most proud of professionally
5. Who They Were as a Person
This is the heart of the life story. Facts can be looked up. Character can only be written by someone who knew them.
- The one word everyone would use to describe them
- A phrase or expression they always used — something people will recognize immediately
- How they made people feel — what it was like to be in a room with them
- Their sense of humor — dry, warm, self-deprecating, quick? Give an example.
- What they were passionate about — not a list, but the thing they'd talk about unprompted
- A quality people didn't always see at first — the depth behind the surface
- The small ritual everyone in the family recognized — a Sunday habit, the way they ended phone calls, the thing they always did at Christmas
18 guided questions that draw out exactly what matters
EverWord's questionnaire is designed to surface the details that make a life story truly personal — not just facts, but character. You answer the questions; we craft the tribute. The result includes both a life story and a full obituary, delivered digitally and printed as a keepsake book.
Start Their Life Story →$149 · Digital delivery in minutes · Physical keepsake book included
6. Passions, Hobbies, and How They Spent Their Time
- Hobbies they were genuinely passionate about — not just "she enjoyed gardening" but what she grew, why she grew it, what she did with it
- Organizations, clubs, or faith communities they belonged to and what those meant to them
- Sports, arts, music, or crafts — especially if they were good at something unexpected
- Books, films, music they loved — not a list, but the one thing that would immediately bring them to mind
- A trip or adventure that mattered to them
- Something they made with their hands — a garden, a home, a recipe, a quilt
7. Their Legacy: What Lives On
- What they gave to the people around them — not gifts, but qualities, values, ways of seeing
- What they believed in — faith, principles, the thing they'd never compromise on
- How they will change the way you live — something you'll do differently because of them
- Something they taught you without ever saying it explicitly
- What you want people to remember about them — in one sentence
8. The Closing Details
- Surviving family members — in traditional order (spouse, children with partners, grandchildren, siblings)
- Those who preceded them in death
- Service details — date, time, location of funeral or celebration of life
- In lieu of flowers — preferred charity or organization, with donation instructions
- A closing line that carries forward their spirit rather than ending on loss
Memory Prompts: Questions That Unlock the Details
If you're sitting with family members trying to gather material, these prompts tend to open the best conversations:
- "Tell me about a time they really surprised you."
- "What's something about them that most people didn't know?"
- "What will you hear in your head, in their voice, for the rest of your life?"
- "What would they have said about the way we're remembering them right now?"
- "What did they teach you — not in words, but in the way they lived?"
- "What's the last thing you want to make sure we don't forget to include?"
"A life story isn't measured by how much it covers. It's measured by how well it captures the one thing that made them entirely themselves."
How to Write It Once You Have the Material
A life story should read as a narrative, not a list. Once you have your material, organize it roughly chronologically — but let the character come through in every section, not just the "personality" paragraph.
Aim for 800–1,200 words for a service reading or keepsake book. Shorter if it will be read aloud at a brief graveside service; longer if it will anchor a full celebration of life program.
The opening should do what the best obituary openings do: start with the person, not the death. A detail, a habit, a phrase — something that immediately places them in the room.
The closing should move forward, not backward. End on legacy, not loss. What lives on because they lived? End there.
Turning a Life Story into a Keepsake
Many families want the life story to outlast the service. Options include:
- A printed memorial book — the full life story in a bound keepsake, often with photos, distributed to family members after the service
- A service program insert — a shorter version printed in the funeral program
- A memorial website — the life story published online so extended family and friends can read it
EverWord produces all three from a single questionnaire. The life story you create becomes a digital document and a printed keepsake book — something the family will return to for decades, not just days.
For more on the writing process, see our complete obituary writing guide. If you're stuck getting started, see how to start when the words won't come. For the essential facts every obituary needs, see what to include in an obituary. Writing for a specific person? See our guides for writing a mother's obituary, a father's obituary, or a husband's obituary. Planning the memorial? Read how to plan a celebration of life or how to write a eulogy for a friend. Or Supporting friends and family? See what to say in a sympathy card. let EverWord write their story for you →